Friday, 16 April 2010

My earliest memory

The earliest memory I have is from when I was about 3 years old. It was my first day at playschool. I remember my mother walking me up the grey concrete steps that led to a blank looking mobile classroom set upon a slight slope. I remember walking deep into the room and staring at all the other kids. Then I remember turning round and seeing my mother waving goodbye. I thought that was it, that my mother was going to leave me forever. That I was alone, that I was here with all these other children that I didn't know. I don't recall my exact thought process but I wonder if it was something to do with knowing I was adopted, and thinking ah no, I'm being given away again. I cried when my mother left. I can't make out the face, but I know that an adult, a lady with blonde (?) hair tried to comfort me, but I remember stomping away from her, inconsolable. Another kid handed me a He Man action figure. I threw it on the floor. I clearly remember seeing a little girl looking scared or unsure of me. I accidentally bumped into a bookshelf, which almost toppled. Some of the adults told me off, thinking that I'd bashed into it on purpose. Don't remember anything else after that.

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